Today started
with shower, laundry, clean bedding etc. I had the feeling that if I had any
sense of smell, I would stink! Hope the energy lasts . I did all the routine tasks
like pills, netti pot etc. and felt good about taking care of myself after a
week of sloth and deep sadness. The air
is still unhealthy so I will get my steps on the rebounder again. It’s the best
I can do. At least I’m clean and had a nutritious breakfast.
Miserable
night and no relief from the outside world. Sixth day of toxic air and six
months of covid isolation. No wonder I’m grumpy. My sinus congestion shows no
sign of improving and the one-side hearing makes me uncomfortable. Grumble,
gripe. And yet, I am safe, have family, food, lovely shelter and love. What
else is there? Today I will relax as much as possible, find something diverting
on Netflix and pretend it’s a choice, not a incarceration. The coast is burning
and I’m safe.
Day five of
gloom, murk, and sadness. All the coast is under the cover of smoke and it’s
impossible to avoid the effects. I did get 10K steps yesterday on the rebounder
and expect to do the same today. Since I’m going to watch endless TV. I use
every commercial to go to the sunporch and jog. It is all the exercise that is
possible. Did a lot of snacking and no real meals. Did connect by phone with Rosalie
and text with Karen and Julia.
Another day
of isolation inside of isolation. It is grim and no end in sight. I got teary
and deeply sad from the thoughts to the losses in many different ways. I feel
for the human loss and the animals, insects, birds, brush and trees. Gray landscapes
of the end of dreams. I suppose I will allow myself to sit and stare at TV again.
The paper journal glares at me and waits for my pen to say something about how
I’m living my life.
Yesterday was
a slug day. Imagine, no product except I did make soup. My head congestion is
not helped by the poor air quality. Today, again, nothing. Watch TV and prowl
from window to window. Yes, I could sort drawers. I could sort books in the
house. I could clean and dust. And I won’t do anything. I read a piece on FB
about honoring the ashes in some way as they are the remains of of the trees
and animals. I like the idea..
Hollie made an early trip to the store for necessary
items. I’m grateful for her care. Still not perky. Low day yesterday with smoke
and ashes besides not feeling well. I may not get dressed today. Gasquet evacuated
to the fairgrounds. The eerie calm with ashes falling and the weird colored sky
are enough to make me go back to bed. The dogs are clean and Jake isn’t making
noise with his toenails. I’m using a lot of facebook to keep up with the fires.
Yesterday my
mind was ahead of my body and I ended up doing very little. Just not feeling
well again today. We have to take the dogs to the groomer and go to the tractor
store for dog food. Other than those tasks, I’m going to do nothing. I love opening
my blinds in the morning and seeing the roses. The variety of colors and the
beauty to start the day are amazing. The smoke is very bad and I don’t want to
go out.
